He's off!

This has been a stressful couple of weeks - I'm not gonna lie. From evacuations to deployments - we have been a busy family! Bill's date to leave was moved a day earlier than we thought. We dropped him off at the airport this morning.

I had been fine - not having really shed a tear, until last night. We always find our boys sleeping together, somewhere, in their room. Sometimes it's on one or the other's bed, or on the floor, etc. Last night, Grant was on Ivan's bed. I was checking on them before we went to sleep and grabbed Bill to take one last peek at their very cute, nightly routine. I left for a minute and came back to Bill holding Grant in the dark. He was just standing there, hugging his sleeping little boy. The dam broke and I was fighting tears for the rest of the evening.

The last day before a deployment, or I would guess before any kind of a separation from a loved one, is a strange one. We were both kind of quiet, contemplative... Before this week, I just could hardly stand the anticipation. Both of us just wanted him to go, so we could get on with it all... But as yesterday went on, Bill finally looked at me and said,"I guess there's no stopping it, right?" I said, "Yeah... funny how I just wanted to get on with this deployment... and now I just want time to stand still." I just wanted him here, to stay... with us.

This morning, we left the house, dropped his truck off at the base (a friend is taking care of it for us) and headed to the airport. We all jumped out of the van, as Bill hauled his bags of gear onto the curb. We chatted, hugged, took some pictures and then got the kids all back into the van. Everything went great - no tears at all! Then, Ivan jumped back out of the van and took a running leap at his dad. Bill picked him up for one last hug, and Ivan quickly jumped down. He grabbed Bill's hand, opened up his fingers and kissed his palm. Bill chuckled and asked,"Ivan, what are ya' doin?!" Ivan looked up and said, "The Kissing Hand, Daddy" ... and gave Bill and huge smile.

If you have not read that tender children's story, it is a good one. It's about a small raccoon, who is afraid to go off to school. His mother opens up his little hand and kisses his palm. She calls it the Kissing Hand, and tells him to put it up to his cheek so he will have her love with him wherever he goes.

Here's this big military dad, being encouraged by his son. We had not even read that book in quite some time, so we were both taken by surprise when Ivan thought to do that. Bill could barely speak. He followed Ivan to the van and kissed his hand too, and Grant's little hand, and reached over and gave Mary one more pat on the head. We parted with tears, but knowing that we will still be loving each other, no matter how far apart we may be.

Here's Ivan, giving Daddy his Kissing Hand. Please continue to pray for our family. I know that God has reasons for everything - even for the military families who are separated through deployments. I am grateful that this is four months, when it could have been longer. I am thankful to have a husband that loves us. I am thankful that I love my husband. I am thankful for the three little people in our house who call me "Mom" and that we can keep each other company and encourage each other while Bill is gone. And, I am thankful that I can pray to a living God who will keep him safe over there. I told a friend today that I'm not worried at all about Bill's safety - I'm worried about mine!

We called Bill tonight, because Ivan was really missing him. I think that is the hardest part for me - trying to figure out how to comfort our kids. We read The Kissing Hand before bedtime. The boys found the heart stickers at the back of the book and asked if they could each have one. I placed one in each of their palms... and one in mine.